My cake theory

Hello dear readers,

Today I want to talk about a theory that I invented this summer while walking in the Scottish mountains with my family and reflecting on the people that had come and gone in my life. Suddenly, it clicked for me, everything made sense. A relationship, whether it's romantic or a friendship, is exactly like making a cake.

Think about it, to make a chocolate cake for example, you need certain ingredients like chocolate, eggs, flour, sugar, milk, butter, etc... Baking a cake requires teamwork. And I feel like it can represent pretty well the dynamic between two people. Each person has to bring an ingredient to be able to make the chocolate cake. It's not gonna happen magically. Ultimately, the taste of the cake symbolizes the quality of the relationship. It's about what each person brings and adds to the cake, making it sweeter, or more sour. Some people bring expired eggs to bake the cake, so the cake will not be good. It's really important that each member brings their best to a relationship, and not just contribute without being mindful or just when it's convenient. Now, I'm not saying it will always be equal, but each person needs to bring what they can. For example, someone can bring most of the ingredients and the other can just bring the chocolate, but even if it's just one ingredient it's essential for the success of the chocolate cake (the relationship). Literally, chocolate cake cannot exist without chocolate. This means that although we go through different phases and can not always give the same amount of energy to a relationship, it's about balancing it out. Friendships or romantic partnerships evolve over time but each person has to bring what they can in that moment to make the chocolate cake (relationship) a success. If someone brings nothing, there is nothing to make. A single person will never be able to be all the ingredients at once, it's impossible. If only one person is committed to making it, the chocolate cake will never be done, because some ingredient will always be missing.

Anyways, I hope you understood what I mean with this cake theory, which is that the success of any type of relationship is based on what each person brings to it, whether it's time, lending an ear, emotional support, authenticity, dedication, effort, and energy. A bond between two people can only be healthy if both people are committed to it and want to make it work because they believe the other person adds something meaningful to their life. So next time you talk with a friend, think about how you talk to them, think about the quality of what you bring to them, your energy. Do you just spend time with them when it's convenient? How do you show them you appreciate them thoughtfully? How do you show initiative or commitment to stay in each other's lives? You can also ask yourself what the other person brings to you and how they show you they want to be in your life. If you feel like there is a lack of balance or you are missing some elements, maybe it's time to have a constructive conversation about how you can both improve to move forward and have a meaningful relationship that is beneficial to both of you.

I hope this article helped in any way improve your view on friendship and understand that it really takes two people to make any relationship work! And with that, I leave you with this quote:

"Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It's not something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven't learned anything." — Muhammad Ali

I wish you to be happy in all the links you create with anyone, family, friends, or romantic partners.

xx -Pablo

Ps: Remember, you can only show up fully in a relationship once you are connected with yourself, so take care of yourself and spend time creating that friendship with yourself first. You'll see, it will radiate onto others and the chocolate cake will be even more delicious ;)